Trying

I'm trying very hard to keep my cool.
I'm trying very hard to look on the bright side.
I'm trying very hard to not mind.
I'm trying very hard to give in.
I'm trying very hard to understand.
I'm trying very hard to forget.
I'm trying very hard to accept everything.
I'm trying very hard to keep silence.
I'm trying so hard, i'm bursting.

I don't know who i can trust or turn to anymore.
Stab me.
I really don't feel right tonight.
I just want work to start asap so i can just work my butt off and not care if i'm part of the world.

Its the 3rd time.
Good night.