Changling Changing

I skipped my desires.
I skipped my "needs".
I try to save.
I cut cost.
Just so that i can make you feel any less stress.

I wonder if the shop-instinct will explode one day?
Pray not.

The almost accident just now, is making me feel like fcuk.
I managed to stop him seconds earlier.
I'm trying very hard to refrain myself of spraying vulgarities here, if you notice.

But i cannot keep it in when i think of..
That look on his face..
That sweating..
That heart..
Tell me how am i supposed to be in peace whenever he's on the road without me?

sigh.
Actually, i really hate it when he calls with jokes of "I just got into an accident".
You have no idea how my heart literally stop beating and how i wanna yell at him for kidding around.
But then i always melt..

I hope my temper keeps running down.
I hope my patience is limit-less.
whatever.

I feel helpless when i think of that...

might be twitting more than i blog.
Night.

i really feel like crap.
must be the period approaching.
can i just vent one last?

fcuk you you and you.